Since I was so happy about Lebron James losing in the NBA Finals, it has taken me until now to realize the horrible, sad truth. Now that the NBA season is officially over, we as Americans have nothing in the world of sports to look forward to for the rest of the summer. Except baseball. And so begins my first rant, and it's about, you guessed it, baseball.
Baseball really can be wrapped up in a sentence or two. And you could say that about everything if you really wanted to. You could say that football is nothing but "throwing a ball back and forth down a field", but we all know there's a lot more to it than that. You could reduce playing the guitar to "picking and strumming strings and moving your fingers up and down a piece of wood", but we all know that's not true. However, baseball really is just "nine guys with gloves trying to prevent the other team from rounding the bases by A. Making them miss when they swing at the ball B. Catching the ball when they hit it or C. Tagging them with the ball." That's it. There is absolutely nothing else whatsoever going on on the field. When not involved in a play, the rest of the players just stand there. That is what we have to look forward to on ESPN this summer, ladies and gentlemen.
If I were MLB commissioner Bud Selig, I would try to institute some rule changes to make baseball more exciting. Like arming the pitchers in the bullpen with sniper rifles. Or releasing a raging bull in the outfield at a random time each inning. Or, after giving up a run, having the pitcher and catcher fight to the death with machetes. Or something that involves lots of violence and people getting seriously injured/maimed. Because baseball is the only major American sport going on right now. And, after all, that's what America is really all about.
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